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adventure into the unknown

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It’s funny.  I used to think that someday, if I payed attention and played all of my cards right, if I worked earnestly and diligently enough, after I had grown older and wiser and smarter and better, I would transcend the discomfort of stepping into the Unknown.  I used to think that someday I would know what I was doing, leaving all of my self-doubt swirling in a trail of dust behind me.  I have spent much of my adult life following big dreams with no path showing me how to get from Here to There.

The entire time I wrote my masters thesis, I had no idea how to write a thesis.

The entire time I wrote my novel, I had no idea how to write a novel.

Throughout my journey teaching journaling as a therapeutic art, I had no idea how to teach journaling as a therapeutic art.

I began speaking to rooms stuffed with therapists, social workers, and psychologists, and I stood there, feeling like a fraud, because I had no idea how I got there, in front of that room full of people.

Every single thing I have endeavored to create has been fraught with the anxiety of not knowing how to do the things I wanted to do.

But the Truth has been sneaking up on me, humored by my naivete, that none of us know what we are doing.  Each day we wake up, we stretch our arms in the air and begin walking into yet another Unknown.

I have come to believe that in order to live up to our dreams, to realize all of the bounty and beauty that is within us, we must be willing to bravely step into the Unknown time and time and time again.  If we are to say “yes” to growth, then we are also saying “yes” to the growing pains that accompany being lost for a time being.  Without these pains, we do not grow.  We stay comfortably where we are, and slowly, build a rut around ourselves.

“The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure.”  -Joseph Campbell

I have come to believe that if we choose to say “yes” to this adventure of life, to the adventure of naming and following our heart’s desires, if we choose to walk through our fear of failure and anxieties about not knowing instead of around them, we will get to the other side.

And there we will plant ourselves in the sun of our souls.  And there we will grow.

  1. i WHOLEHEARTEDLY AGREE, DEAR jANNA. xo

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